JMS Clones and B5 Love Lives

[B5JMS Poster]

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
From: SimnJestr at aol.com
Date: 26 Jun 2000 07:53:43 -0600
Lines: 61

I was watching my tape of "Endgame" last night, and a thought struck me.  

I always thought it amusing that the B5 commanders, Jeffrey Sinclair and John 
Sheridan, both share their initials with Joe Straczynski.  Toss in Michael 
Garibaldi, whose first name is JMS's middle name, and it's clear that JMS put 
a lot of himself into the show.  

What I just realized is that the ONLY male characters who end the series with 
a happy marriage are those characters who are apparently named after JMS 
himself.  Think about it.  Sheridan is married to Delenn, Garibaldi remarries 
Lise, and Sinclair apparently hooks up again with Catherine Sakai when back 
in the past as Valen.  The other male characters have the following fates:

Londo: Has several infamous bad marriages. His one true love is killed by 
Morden and her death blamed on Refa.  
G'Kar: Has fetish for Earth Women, who almost certainly can't breed with him 
without serious biogenetic intervention.  
Zack Allan: Can't even get a date with Lyta when she's starving and 
desperate, and he brings pizza.  
Dr. Franklin: Has several love affairs, but they all either leave him or die 
of lingering illnesses.  
Marcus Cole: Dies a Virgin, widely considered a great tragedy among female 
fans.
Vir Cotto: Has an arranged marriage to a psychotic mass murderer, but does 
eventually get some nice concubine poontang when he's crowned emperor.
Lennier: Has unrequited passion for Delenn, goes into self-imposed exile.
Warren Keffer: Dies apparently unattached.

And unless they marry one of the JMS clones, the women of B5 don't do too 
well, either.  

Ivanova: Has several bad relationships, and the two that might have worked 
(Talia, Marcus) both die on her.  
Lyta: Falls madly for Byron, who shortly ends up a crispy critter.  Last seen 
wandering the galaxy with G'Kar.  
Na'Toth: No known boyfriends before her 3-year incarceration on Centauri 
Prime.  

But even getting involved with a JMS clone has a high failure rate:  

Captain Lochley: Even though she married Sheridan, it ended in divorce.  
Anna Sheridan: Another ex-Sheridan Wifey, she retired to the Little House at 
Ground Zero.  
Dodger: One night of passion with Garibaldi before Franklin's Dad uses her as 
Laser Fodder.  
Carolyn Sykes: Broke up with Sinclair sometime between the Pilot and the 
first episode.  

Oh, and need I mention that JMS's own Spousal Overunit is named Kathryn, 
while Sinclair's fiancee is named Catherine Sakai (yet another last name 
beginning with "S")?  

Actually, I'm probably reading too much into this.  On the other hand, this 
is exactly the kind of nitpicking that careers are made of in University 
English Departments.  

Martin "The Mess" Hohner <*>  SimnJestr at aol.com
"Men rise from one ambition to another; first they seek 
to secure themselves from attack, and then they attack 
others."  -- Niccolo Machiavelli, _Discorsi_, 1531


=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
From: jmsatb5 at aol.com (Jms at B5)
Date: 26 Jun 2000 21:19:49 -0600
Lines: 17

One suggestion:

Thorazine, and lots of it.

 jms

(jmsatb5 at aol.com)
B5 Official Fan Club at:
http://www.thestation.com
(all message content (c) 2000 by
synthetic worlds, ltd., permission
to reprint specifically denied to
SFX Magazine)




-***
-*** B5JMS SUBSCRIBERS: Replies to messages go to the list maintainer,
-*** <b5jms-owner at cs.columbia.edu>.  If you want to reply elsewhere, adjust
-*** the "To" field.  See http://www.cs.columbia.edu/~ezk/b5jms/ for all
-*** other information about this list.